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Steel Talon Elliott ( May 31, 1991 - June 1 2020)

Posted by lookpastit@gmail.com on June 1, 2020 at 6:00 AM


This post is in loving memory of my little brother, Steel Talon Elliott, who died this year of a heart-attack (non COVID-19 related.) 


"Remember you're human." My Mom said to me.


It keeps ringing in my mind because the implication that I think I am inhuman, or maybe superhuman... hangs there. (For the record: I am plain ole' human.)


I cannot help but to recognize this misconception that choosing to be happy all the time means we might choose not to feel ANY negative feels EVER!


When it is more like:

IF you choose to be happy all the time, when you DO feel a negative emotion (and you still do, it's a natural part of our evolution,) you know how to acknowledge it and choose your next thought toward happiness, so that the negative feels only lasts seconds, minutes, or maybe a couple hours... not days, weeks, months, years, and becomes a 'natural state of misery...'


I cannot help but to realize, this is because being happy all the time is not perceived as a human thing; because we (as a series of cultures within a global society) have been conditioned for so long to think suffering is just a part of life, and suffering is needed to make you stronger, and suffering is needed to be triumphant! Suffering makes you a good person!!!


I call bullshit.


I am not inhuman or superhuman, I am just plain ole' human who made a choice in January 2019 ***TO BE HAPPY NO MATTER WHAT***, to stop letting my happiness be tied to specific conditions I may or mayn't be able to experience in a moment.


Yes, it is a choice to be happy!


I decided I no longer wanted to be miserable, hurting emotionally, and carrying weight I couldn't barely contain or explain to anyone, but which saddened my eyes perpetually, and made me feel weak, exhausted, worthless, and (more often than I care to admit,) suicidal.

Never again!


A little over a year later, I can confidently say I don't feel like that anymore, and can barely remember when I did. Now I am happy all the time, with mere moments of sadness, anger, frustration, etc... moments that last seconds, minutes, or maaaaybe an hour, and then I am able to choose my happiness again, one thought at a time.


I spend my days happy, light hearted, full of joy and excited anticipation of what the universe will bring me to enjoy now, and now, and now, and now.... Every second is a new now.

Even the death of my little brother Steel Elliott and my cousin James T Elliott couldn't weigh me down, despite (or perhaps because of) how much I love them and myself. (Yes, and myself!)


It is not inhuman or superhuman to recognize they left their pains behind with their physical bodies when they died; AND TO REJOICE!


It is not inhuman or superhuman to recognize they are at peace with themselves, and the whole of the universe now; AND TO REJOICE!


It is not inhuman or superhuman to understand they are still with me, and never left me because we are all connected; AND TO REJOICE!


It is not inhuman or superhuman to realize when I mourn their physical presence, I am really mourning I how I felt when around them (largely happy, so largely in alignment with myself... with them happy and in alignment with themselves.); AND TO REJOICE IN THE KNOWING!


It is not inhuman or superhuman to use my thoughts to navigate my emotional spectrum; AND TO REJOICE THAT I CAN!


It is not inhuman or superhuman to realize that my emotions tell me that the WAY I am thinking about (whatever) is not the way my soul/spirit is thinking about (whatever) and so I feel bad for as long as I think like that.

It is not inhuman or superhuman to seek alignment with myself.

It is not inhuman or superhuman to HAVE alignment with myself.

It is not inhuman or superhuman to feel happy 99% of the time.




I would argue (and I thank my little brother and my cousin for taking the plunge into the next, that I might have this thought) that as our soul/spirits are pure positive energy, the natural state of our human existence IS happiness, joy, and excited anticipation, and that only through our thought-conditionings, have we believed anything else.


That, just like their physical lives were finite and they are now gone physically, every single moment we live is exactly the same... finite, and gone from our physical existence.


We think it is normal to mourn the death of a person because we acknowledge we cannot 'get them back'.... yet we do not put the same value on our moments, every moment, that we cannot get back once it's passed...


I am not trying to horde my enlightenment and look down on all those who don't have it (I don't look down on anyone, because they are me, in the deep of it)...


I have been working on forming the image-thoughts and word-thoughts that will help me illustrate the simple truths I have discovered through my own experience, for the express purpose of enjoying sharing what I have learned.


I want everyone to be happy. (But my happiness isn't contingent on it.)

I want everyone to be in alignment with themselves. (But my alignment with myself is not contingent on it.)


I want everyone to enjoy the fact they have negative emotions to help them navigate what their soul/spirit is doing/thinking, and that their positive emotions help tell them when they're back in alignment with their whole self. (But my understanding is not contingent on anyone else agreeing with me. I know by experience and no one can take that from me.)




So, I challenge you, if you read through this whole soliloquy, the next time you feel bad, ask yourself if it is because you're proverbially going in the wrong direction, or because you're thinking thoughts your soul/spirit won't think with you... try to reach for thoughts that make you feel happier... do it consistently, and see if you don't find your life changed forever!


I love my little brother. I love my cousin. I love everyone who joins me in the physical world right here and now, all those who will come, and all those who have come before me.


Namaste.

M.E.


202007140812 EST

#loss #rip #mourning #life #inspiration #choosehappiness #lawofone #awakening #emotion #love 

Categories: True Stories, Thoughts of the Day